The Breakfast of Paradise
by StopJustStop
Summary: Conker and Cooking Mama crossover. When Conker is offered breakfast by a certain motherly chef after waking up in her house, he takes the offer. But, as Conker would soon find out, he was brought here for much more than just breakfast.


**The Breakfast of Paradise**

"9:37" the digital clock read. Conker opened his eyes, slowly and groggily, to see the timer. "Ugh... I feel like I only went to sleep 3 hours ago..." said Conker. He was about to return to his slumber, when he realized that he didn't recognize where he was. He looked around the room and couldn't find any feature he could see as familiar. He got out of bed, removing the mysterious covers from his tired body. He yawned and looked at himself in the mirror. He wore a shirt and jeans, and his eyes were bloodshot. He hesitated to exit into the rest of the house, fearing what might be beyond. A few minutes later, he realized that it was his only option. "Fuck it." said Conker. "I'm goin' out."

Conker opened the door slowly, and stepped out into the hallway, where he could hear the sound of someone cooking while humming. The humming voice sounded feminine. Conker went into the kitchen to see what exactly was going on.

"Oh, hello Conker! I didn't know you would be up this early!" said the woman, who smiled at Conker.

Conker was very confused. "Where am I?"

The woman answered. "You're in my house! You were passed out on the side of the street, so I took you in." She was smiling in a carefree way while explaining this.

Conker was still confused, until he realized what happened last night. He was chased out of town by a group of monsters and didn't know where to go. It was a wonder he didn't die.

"I see you're still confused." said the woman. "Well, you can call me Mama. Cooking Mama. I'm making breakfast, do you want any?"

Conker blushed. "Y... yes. Yes I do, Cooking Mama."

Cooking Mama smiled. "Do you want coffee with that?"

"Yes."

As Conker sat down at the table in disbelief, Mama cooked the meal in complete silence. "This isn't a dream..." said Conker to himself. "It feels far too real. I can't believe this is happening to me." Conker looked as Cooking Mama was almost done preparing their meals. Any second now, she was going to be finished. The wait made Conker realize that he was still very tired, and he dozed off for a few minutes.

"Breakfast is ready!"

Conker immediately awoke after hearing this. Cooking Mama served Conker a stack of pancakes, with a bottle of maple syrup for pouring, and a mug of coffee on the side. "Wow. This looks great." said Conker out loud.

"I know it is." replied Cooking Mama.

Conker poured some syrup on the top-most pancake, and cut out a piece to eat. Conker was amazed. "This is delicious, Mama!" said Conker happily, as he cut out another piece of pancake.

"Thanks." said Cooking Mama, with a very happy expression on her face. Conker took a sip of his coffee, and went back to work on his pancakes.

After about 10 minutes, Conker was completely finished with breakfast. He washed off his plate and mug, and then let out a loud belch, which had alerted Mama. "I see you enjoyed my meal."

"Yeah." said Conker. "That was amazing."

"Well..." Mama started. "The fun doesn't have to stop there." Cooking Mama stared at Conker with lust in her eyes. Conker knew exactly what Mama wanted. He looked at her. She was very sexy, with shapely breasts and a nice round ass. Everything about her was so alluring to Conker. He was definitely very aroused.

"I'd love to." After hearing this, Cooking Mama got down on the floor and spread her legs. Conker then sat down behind her and started to entice her by putting one of his hands down Cooking Mama's pants and finding her tight, perfect vagina. He took two fingers and started to massage her love hole. Even this small amount of teasing made Cooking Mama moan loudly. As Conker felt Cooking Mama's vagina, he could imagine its shape and size, and he was already aroused at the thought of penetrating it. He moved his fingers in, out, up, down, and around Mama's gorgeous vagina, and just the rubbing caused Mama to go nuts. Conker felt his hand getting wet, and Cooking Mama looked down to see her fluids soaking through her pants.

"I can tell you like it." said Conker.

"You bet I do!" said Mama as her orgasm went out of control.

"How about we take it a bit further?" asked Conker.

"Yes! Please do!" pleaded Cooking Mama. Before she knew it, her apron was lifted up, her pants and underwear were removed from her body, and Conker had his pants undone, showing off his effervescent penis that throbbed with joy and whimsy. Conker then plunged into Cooking Mama's welcoming orifice, ready for action.

"Zounds! Your dick is in my pussy!" said a surprised Cooking Mama to Conker.

"You bet!" said Conker as he thrust in and out of Cooking Mama's delicious truffle.

Cooking Mama moaned with pure delight as Conker wreaked havoc on her inner walls. He then grabbed the bottle of maple syrup that Mama gave him for his pancakes.

"Do you want some of this in you?" asked Conker.

"Oh my god, that would be amazing." said Cooking Mama.

Conker then poured some maple syrup on his hands and rubbed it in Cooking Mama's pussy and on his penis. The sticky sensation really did bring a whole new angel to their sexual escapades. Cooking Mama shrieked and moaned with pure pleasure. "I don't want this to ever end..." said both at the same time.

Cooking Mama could hardly take much more. She was about to burst! Conker was too much for her to handle for much longer! Conker thrust a few more times, and Cooking Mama had climaxed. Sadly, that wasn't the only thing she did. A large stream of urine came out of her as well, soaking Conker and getting on the floor.

Conker noticed what was happening. "Oh god! Yeah Mama, give me all of that lemonade! Mmm!"

Cooking Mama moaned with pleasure. She knew she was making a mess, but she didn't care. She was too caught up in pure pleasure. Piss was covering Conker, and he loved every bit of it. As the stream of piss coated him in its warm embrace, Conker got some in his mouth and swallowed it. "Fuck! Cooking Mama! Your piss tastes great!" Cooking Mama smiled at this. The piss also made good lubricant, they were soon to find, when Conker used it to thrust even faster, and even harder than before. Conker took some of the piss and had Cooking Mama lick it off of his hand. "Mmm!" Mama said. They were both in the embraces of true love. They were amazed. They were complete. Then, Conker went and came valiantly inside of Cooking Mama. He pulled his dick out, and squirted cum all over Cooking Mama, on her shirt, and even a bit in her mouth, which Mama had swallowed.

Cooking Mama got dressed, and Conker helped her clean up the bodily fluids on the floor. As they had finished they looked at each other happily.

"Thanks for letting me stay here." said Conker.

"You're welcome." said Mama. "Thanks for letting me experience you. Do you want to stay the night?"

Conker thought for a bit. "Yes. I'd love to." They held hands and kissed.

**THE END**


End file.
